Happy 30th Jordan

My firstborn turns 30 today! It’s really hard to wrap my head around the fact I could have a 30 year old but here we are. Jordan threw herself a 90’s themed birthday bash this past weekend. It was complete with slap bracelets, butterfly clips and food from her childhood like lunchables, totinos pizza rolls, spaghetti o’s and bagel bites. There was an infused bar set up to mix a little liquor into your capri sun and lots of 90’s music.

What made this party complete, though, was the smile that never left her face. Jordan was the happiest little girl, full of life and always ready to celebrate anything and everything. She loved singing and dancing and loved being herself. The last 10 years, however, I’ve watched this girl struggle alot.

There have been so many good things like college graduation and success in the workplace and travel to so many fun places, but also lots of heartbreak. A piece of me is not that sad to wave goodbye to her 20’s as they were rough on this mom’s heart. I must say, however, what has arrived on the other side is quite beautiful.

On Saturday night, as I watched this girl sit on the stage and soak up the love of all her friends and family as they sang her happy birthday my eyes welled up with tears. I have dreamed of so many things for my children but above all else I want them to be happy. Seeing the smile on her face and feeling her truly receive all this adoration that she so deserves was a moment I’ll never forget.

Through lots of hard work, Jordan has found her way back to herself. I see so much more of that little girl she once was coming through in her ability to have fun, see the positive side of things, love others well and believe she is worthy of it all. She is smart, capable and beautiful inside and out.

Jordan Ashlee, your momma loves you so much. You will always be the girl who saved me from wrecking my own life and you gave me all the hope that life could be beautiful. So many times I wanted to rush in and repay the favor and rescue you from the troubles of this world but I’m so glad I didn’t. You have used it all and turned the tears into gold. I’m beyond proud of the woman you are and I wouldn’t trade a day being your mom.