Grateful Heart Monday – Anger & Grace

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I have a fly off the handle kind of temper.  I’m not proud of it and I feel like I definitely am in more control than I use to be but I still have those times when I act completely irrational and typically one of my family members receives the brunt of it.  This weekend it happened to be my husband.  
Several years back I remember hearing a sermon that stuck with me about how our instinct is to judge ourselves on our intentions and judge others on their actions.  When faced with a situation I usually try to apply this simple logic and determine if the person I’m about to go zero to 60 crazy on really set out with the intention to hurt me with their actions.  Unfortunately more times than not when it’s one of my family members I react too quickly to apply any logic and become enraged to the point of just silliness often over something that is so ridiculous.  This is seriously also when technology is not my friend as I sometimes (okay a lot of times) will send a scathing text message during my irrational outburst.  
I always, always calm down very quickly and I absolutely always feel ridiculous when it’s over that I let something small cause me to lose my cool.  I know that satan sees this weakness in me and even in the midst of my fit on Saturday I was thinking how happy he must be that I was losing it.  Then as God always does, He sent me right to a spot where I would find this verse.  
I thought it was ironic as well that the verse would be from James and my husband’s real name is James even though he goes by Keith.  It really made me think about how I had overreacted.  All I kept saying to him was he would have been so angry at me had I made the same choice he made but I was just trying to justify my response as he always keeps his cool.  I know in my heart of hearts he did not set out with the intention to upset me.  His actions did upset me but had I really taken the time to consider all the things I know to be true I would have known it was not his intention and I would have responded in a much more rational way.  
I am so very grateful for a family who gets my crazy, irrational moments and still commit to loving me through it and giving me the grace to be myself even when it isn’t so graceful.  I am grateful for a God who knows my weakness just as well as satan does and is always there to save me from myself if I am just willing to open my heart and soul to listen. 
What are you grateful for today?  
Grateful Heart w/ Ember Grey

Sweet Little Ones

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26 Comments

  1. Thanks for sharing this today. Last week I did a post about an embarrassing moment, and I can totally relate to this post. I too often react too quickly and don't taste my words before I say them. We are all human and make mistakes ! Thanks for sharing today. Have a great week

    1. Maybe my taste buds are numb from all the ugly that has come out of my mouth! ha! I definitely need to work harder on this one. Have a great week!

  2. Awesome post (not that you got mad at Keith, but awesome that you shared). I just read last night about a 4 second rule – before saying, doing, reacting, etc. take a four second breath. It said we would be amazed how four little seconds could make you reconsider saying, texting, doing, etc. something we might regret. I filed that away – thankful I've been up for a little bit and haven't had to use it {yet}! 🙂

  3. It's so great that you're able to recognize when you go too far and come down from your anger quickly! So much more damage is done when people hold on to things like that. Today I'm grateful for rest and grace with myself and others. Thanks for sharing your story!

  4. I call that Word Vomit in my house. And I am bad about having it. Especially when my kiddos were little. Now that they are Bigs, I don't do that as much but occasionally my hubby takes that word vomit from me. Horrible. Today I am thankful for a cut and color on my hair later this morning 🙂 Have a great day!

  5. So glad you shared this!! I also battle with this. I pray about it daily that God will help me with my temper! and just as you said, I also get over it quick and then feel horrible!! I am so glad I am not the only one!! and this verse is one that I carry around in my bag! Happy Monday!

    1. I get over things quickly but I need to be so much more conscious about how others do not….and my words sometimes leave a bitter sting and that makes me sad. Work..in…progress…always!

  6. Shelly, I started following your blog a few months ago. We're about the same age and accounting is my field of study as well. Your post today showed me we have yet another thing in common- this one more unfortunate than the other two! I read the book "Unglued" by Lysa Terkeurst this weekend. It was great and is about "making wise choices in the midst of raw emotions". I think you'd like it too! Thanks again for sharing!

    1. Hi Tami! That book is so good…I read it in 2013…hmmmm…maybe I need to refresh myself again! I finished her Best Yes in January and it too had some great advice. Thanks so much for reading and commenting! Have a great week.

    1. For sure….I know I've run across it previously but finding it in the heat of the moment really made me think a little harder about my actions. Have a great week!

  7. I so love your honesty in this post. I can certainly relate and realize that sometimes my filter doesn't catch harsh words as they leave my mouth. Great scripture–thanks so much for sharing!

    1. Thanks Jenny…..I know I have run across this verse before but maybe finding it in this moment will help it stick! I'm still thinking about that Sushi by the way! haha

  8. As always, I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability to share the lessons life teaches you with us. Thanks for setting such a great example! 🙂

  9. This is me all the time😣😞!! Such a great post!!!! I sometimes think I'm just projecting. I let things I don't like in myself & see in my kids set me off…always a work in progress.

  10. Love you open, honest, transparent post! I have found that even while I am venting,(or fill-in-the-blank with any other sin), if I will repeat the Truth about me that God sees, like, "I am the righteousness of God in Christ"…I begin to see myself the way God sees me, and the anger, bitterness, and resentment disappear.

  11. "our instinct is to judge ourselves on our intentions and judge others on their actions." – um, WOW. I'm sitting over here (with a big spotlight shining down) speechless. I'm….. pretty positive God wanted me to read this TODAY. (Which is funny, considering you wrote this last week and I'm only just now getting to it.) Thank you for sharing this!

  12. I completely understand where you are coming from as I too have a temper and have been trying so hard these last few years to control it.

    Thank you so much for sharing your heart in this way. I am also grateful for a family that still loves me even when I fail, and a God whose grace extends even to me.

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